Schadenfreude

I have to admit that I have been guilty of experiencing a little pleasure at someone else's expense and I almost sort of feel bad. Suffice it to say that some things are not meant to happen and some people just can't see the writing on the wall.

I am concerned that a lot of people from my generation and younger have been going through their lives expecting a certain amount of things handed to them and, when faced with the idea of not being able to “just have” whatever that thing is they want, they shut down. There's no internal communication, no consideration, no rational thought process. It's just “But I want it.”

I have, by no means, struggled nearly as much as many people in life, and especially people in the world. I have rarely gone hungry, was provided the necessities as child, and have no sincere complaints about the way my life is right now. As much as I sometimes “want” something, I can usually either justify why I a.) don't need it b.) don't deserve it or c.) just can't have it.

If I can, somehow, and want it badly enough, I find a way to get it. I'm not sure that I've expected anything to be handed to me in all of my adult life.

Sometimes you get an idea about something and, after sitting down and reading about it or looking it up or talking with another person about it, you realize how complicated it really is and move on. Buying a car, for example. I avoided doing this for as long as I possibly could as a teenager. At 19 I had a job where it was required of me to have transportation and the car I was driving at the time died. I didn't have the thousands of dollars to get it fixed, but I did have good enough credit to get approved for a newer car. It took days to get all the paperwork squared away and I was at the dealership for hours and hours at a time.
Eventually, I walked out (or, drove, rather) with a new car that lasted me for six years. It had a flat tire once and I got the oil changed (when I thought of it). Since then I've signed off on paperwork to buy three other cars and each time it gets easier.

I can't imagine why I waited so long to buy a car. I was scared. Worried that I'd be taken advantage of. Now I walk in and say “This is what I want and this is how much I'm going to pay.” They still drag the process out as much as they can, but it doesn't seem to be nearly as bad as it did that first time.

Now, when I'm faced with a task that seems tedious or difficult, I ask how badly I want to complete that thing. Do I want a new car someday again? Then I'll have to be prepared with a down payment, a free afternoon, and a pen. I wouldn't walk into a car dealership, demand a new Toyota Prius and then start crying when they ask for information to run a credit check.

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