Other Things You Didn't Know About Me

I don't like being around really drunk or really hungover people. Especially the ones who are either really maudlin or really loud.

The guy who took my wedding photos is a schizophrenic with delusions of persecution.

I hate waiting. I don't mind waiting in line, but I hate waiting for people.

I'm perpetually early.

I have trouble sleeping but when I do fall asleep, nothing can wake me up.

I can't keep plants and flowers alive but I've managed to bring back one houseplant from near-death several times for almost 8 years.

I think potted plants and flowers are a better gift than cut ones because they last longer.

I cook with onions but I refuse to eat them.

I didn't write my own birthday down on the calendar this year because I don't want to think about it.

I feel like I'm way too old to care if anyone remembers my birthday anymore.

I hate surprises. But I hate it even more when people tell me there's a surprise and then they won't tell me what it is. That's teasing.


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