I wish I had time to upload a photo I took of the mold that grew in our little petri dish. Suffice it to say that Charlie promptly presented our current landlady with it and we'll be moving out soon. He also told her he doesn't expect to have any problems with the deposit.
She tried to act like we knew about it (“Oh, I thought I told you about that when you moved in!”) but eventually it just became Charlie saying “None of this really matters. The point is that Courtney's been sick for months and we can't stay here.”
Now if only we had a place and a ton of people to move us out.