Writer's Block

I think, other than a few instances, I have had a serious case of writer’s block since the inception if this journal.
I used to have one that I kept on DiaryLand for a couple of years where I felt more worthy of being called a “blogger,” except for the fact that it was through a free site, so I don’t know if that’s the same.
I had an actual base of dozens of readers, regular comments from them, and lots of time and crap to babble about.
Having somewhat of a “fan base” wasn’t my intention, nor did I feel important because of it. So when I started getting too popular, of course, people started having nasty things to say about me. I don’t take straight-up criticism very well. My general response was “Then don’t read it,” but people do so enjoy telling you what they don’t like about you. I eventually locked the journal so only “friends” I designated could read it, but then it wasn’t fun anymore. One girl in particular had a habit of finding ways to email me and tell me what I was doing wrong in my life based on what she had read in my blog/journal/diary/whatever. She even stole some photos from my site from St. Petersburg, where she happens to live, and claimed them as her own. Not cool. So I lost interest and started taking it apart, post by post.
I’m not saying it was the best thing to do, or that I don’t regret letting a few people spoil a creative outlet for me, but it’s gone now.

I realize that, here, I tend to either recount my day’s events, or complain about something that’s bothering me.
I’m taking a creative writing course online next semester, and I hope that manages to knock some stuff loose. The last time I bothered to sit down and “write” anything besides I-got-up-I-went-to-work-I’m-tired was probably the DiaryLand journal or when a group of friends and I got together for a few writing and reading groups. That was fun but it was difficult to keep everyone interested.
I feel like I could have developed into a much better writer if I had kept up with it. I had the inclination when I was in high school, but what I remember scribbling down all the time was . . . well, typical of a high school kid.

I feel like I’ve allowed myself to get way too wrapped up in the stupid day-to-day crap, and have not pressed myself to be creative at all. That’s kinda sad.


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